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Tuesday, December 27, 2011

ASOS... again.


Why does ASOS have the nicest stuff dammit the free international shipping promotion isn't helping either. I AM SO TEMPTED. HELP. :(

Eber Balentime




Eber Balentine (HAHAHA) I mean, Evil Valentine's new launch will be on the new year! Exact timing of launch will be up together with full previews muaxmuaxs.

If you've a good eye you'd have saw 'my' modeling. My faceless modeling for the bags and accessories. The apparels, however, would be modelled by an ultra mega gorgeous new model... (Okay lah I don't keep y'all in suspense just go facebook.com/shopevilvalentine and see if you're curious haha)

I love love love love love Collection 11. I want to keep everything for myself. I swear.

It's that good.

And there's more than 40-50 designs? +++ Brownie points ^^



TIME TO SPLURGE GURLS
OK TOODLES TRULY BYE.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Constant battle.

A constant battle with my self-esteem.

"She's pretty. I am not." "She's smart. I am not." "She's so... (inserts positive adjective/noun here)... and I am just not."

List of things I hate about myself: The way I look. The way I dress. The way I speak. The way I do things. The way I behave in front of others/strangers.

Everything. But mainly, the way I look.

Sometimes, I feel that I look okay enough. Sometimes, I feel like I look pretty decent. Those are the better times. I have never felt "extraordinarily pretty" in my life before. The worst of all is, make-up just don't really look good on me. I'm one of those girls that looks better without make-up.

Most of the other times, I'd be questioning my looks. I think I frustrate A with my 'HI-I-THINK-I-LOOK-UGLY' periodical rants. But it's the truth. My facial features. My body. Everything. They're just not... 'perfect'. I know I shouldn't be pursuing perfection in my looks since no one is born with a perfect face/body, but... well, Thoughts like this flashes past every single day "Why do you have such ugly teeth?", "Why are your dark eye circles and eye bags so bad?", "Why does your eyes look so droopy?", "Your jaw sticks out like a frog", or simply "Shermin, you look like Sadako today." Okay, maybe I am kidding about the last part. But the general statements still remain true.

And the next thing is, I am not photogenic. Not. At. All. If I already dislike how I look, then I FUCKING HATE HOW I LOOK LIKE IN PICTURES. Good lord, I think I'd have to take like, a hundred pictures before I can finally find a picture that looks semi-decent to be posted up onto the blog, which explains why I don't have a lot of photos here.

I only choose the selected few where I look decent enough to be posted here. I'd like to be one of those girls who can post up million pictures of themselves on the blog because they're pretty enough. I don't know if people noticed, but whenever I take pictures, I tend to refrain/avoid facing the camera with a full-frontal view. Lately, I've resorted to using Photobooth/Instagram for the pictures on my blog because they tend to cover up my flaws more easily. On the other hand, DSLR exposes all parts of your shitty complexion. :/

I still remember, during the first shoot of EV, I was forced to model for some of the clothings as they're relatively small sized. So my friend/the other model, Linglin piled on some make-up on me and took a few shots of me. I LOOKED LIKE SHIT. PLUS I LOOK LIKE A TRANNY DAMN. Each time I go for a collection shoot, I'd start to think "Sigh, if only I am pretty and photogenic enough to model for my own blogshop without ruining it..."

Did you know that in order to get 'my pictures' off the page, I deliberately cut the prices of some of the items that I modelled in so that I can remove them asap. Yeah, it was that bad.

Then.

The way I speak. I always have pronunciations errors. It makes me embarrassed too, the fact that I can't enunciate certain words. Sometimes I question whether I have a lisp or short tongue. Plus, I am not good with words. I don't know how to open up to people. I always think that I am behaving in an ultra awkward manner whenever I talk to new people. All of the above explains why I am SO DAMN SOCIALLY AWKWARD, especially with strangers/new people I meet. I don't socialize with people unless they talk to me first, and most people don't dare to talk to me first since I have a scary and intimidating outlook. People often tells me that their first impression of me was that I am damn dao and quiet.

Or look as if their father or their entire clan/extended family owed me a million dollars or something lololol.

One of the reason why I hate attention is because I don't like to be casted with stares/weird looks. It makes me feel like I am inadequate, and therefore, I'll get more judgmental of myself. Heck, I think I judge myself more than anybody else in this world, which probably explains the lack of self-esteem I have in myself?

I really really really dislike how I look and behave, and I'd like to change it, but I really can't. At least not right now. It'll probably take a long time, probably decades or even centuries for me to start changing this negative mindset. I've bore this mindset for the past 17 years and it's likely that I'll feel the same way another seventeen years down the road.

Sigh.

Sigh.

Sigh.

I feel like I am pretty "awesome" for taking 1 week to pen this entry.

Yup.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Five percent.

This is so true it's not even funny.

Your Jungian Personality type is ISFP
ISFPs are interested in the fine arts. Expression primarily through action or art form. 5% of the total population.

ISFPs can be over-accepting of others and need to be more skeptical at times. Their need to please everyone makes them reluctant to critique any one but themselves. This excessive desire to trust others makes them targets for hurt feelings and disadvantaged relationships. Long-range planning and adherence to policies can be their downfall. When the freedom to act on their instincts is limited, ISFPs become bored, restless, and passively defiant. They are skilled at seeming to comply with regulations while annoying those who cause them distress.



If stress continues to build, ISFPs will penalize others through self-degrading behavior. This behavior has the tendency to divert accountability away from themselves and onto others who they blame for their plight. This restores the excitement back into ISFP's lives while at the same time getting even with their accused oppressors. Rationalizing their responsibilities, stressed-out ISFPs attempt to find their way out of unstimulating circumstances through seeking inappropriate thrills.

Careers

This lists represent careers and jobs people of your type tend to enjoy doing. The job requirements are similar to the personality tendencies of your personality type. It is important to remember that this is not a list of all the jobs possible. And it is very important to remember that people can, and frequently do, fill jobs that are dissimilar to their personality... this happens all the time...and sometimes works out quite well.

bookkeeper
clerical supervisor
dental assistant
physical therapist
mechanic
radiology technologist
surveyor
chef
forester
geologist
landscaper designer
crisis hotline operator
teacher: elementary
beautician
typist
jeweler
gardener
potter
painter
botanist
marine biologist
social worker

Take it here: http://www.personalitytest.net/ if you want to :)

Monday, December 5, 2011

Instagrammmmmz.





INSTAGRAM IS GOD.

IT FULFILLS MY SUPERFICIAL TENDENCIES OF CAMWHORING WITH LOMO EFFECTSSSS. I want a iPhone Pour Ass nao (Thank you Becca, for typing it as iPhone Pour Ass. Now I can no longer resist calling iPhone 4S as iPhone Pour Ass LOL) solely because of Instagram and the cameraaaa.

But for now, I can only use A's iPhone 4S because I am stuck with a BB till December 2012. :(
What if the world ends and I still haven't got a iPhone yet? D: /shudders

Sorry Blackberry, as much as I love you and the QWERTY keyboard... you're really getting a little obsolete. :( But it's okay, I still love you, just that I am an unfaithful owner and I've found a new crush lmao.

P/S: I have no idea why I am still blogging when I really should be replying EV's mails + work on my projects. STRESSBALLZ!

Oh and You're the Durian of my eye tomorrow with A. Yes. Durian. Hehe. /inside joke.

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Stressball.

Warning: Rant Post V2. Incoherency ahead.

WTFBBQ I HATE ALL OF YOU STUPID MODULES. WHY ARE ALL THE DEADLINES CRAMPED TOGETHER? WHY? HUH? WHY? FUCK Y'ALL. I AM AS STRESSED AS A MIDGET ON MOUNT EVEREST WHO IS GOING TO GET PUSHED DOWN THE FUCKING MOUNTAIN. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW THE ABOVE STATEMENT MAKES SENSE BUT IT JUST DOES TO ME.

I NEED A STRESSBALL LAH UGH.

I HATE ECONS I HATE VPDP I HATE IPRA. I THINK NEWS WRITING IS THE ONLY MODULE I DON'T FUCKING HATE THIS SEM.

Okay, the end, bye. Thanks for tolerating with my CAPLOCKS-I-AM-IN-RAGE self. The sane Shermin is back.

And customers of EV, please please please be patient. I am sorry for the wait too. UGH.

Saturday, December 3, 2011

Santa, where are you?

Credits: STYLENANDA.COM A.K.A MY FAV KOREAN WEBSITE OF ALL TIME. ♥_♥

Christmas should come asap. So that my dear Santa will shove these goodies down my non-existent chimney. Then again, I don't have a chimney so... sux2beme. But hey Santa, I do have a government-issued rubbish chute though, does it help? OKAY NOT HELPING THAT WAS SO LAME HAHAH OK BAI.

Zara

Credits: Zara's November Lookbook

Looks like it's time to take a strut inside Zara. Haven't been shopping there for a loooooooong time.

P/S: Not too much a fan of the floral prints though... till now, I still don't get the hype behind it. The floral blouse, especially. D: But then again, I've never really been a prints person.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Sixth.






My momma once said, "You can never stay in a relationship beyond 3 months. Either you'll get bored first or the guy will just give up on you because he'd be too frustrated with keeping up with your tamtrums".

But... I think it's time for my momma to take back her own words haha.

Happy sixth month, love. I think we both didn't see that we'd last this long, but guess what? We did heh.

We spent the entire day with an Alvin & The Chipmunks marathon (HAHAHHA) and me spazzing like helllll over Theodore. THEODORE IS THE CUTEST THING EVER ASDFGHJKL; and you getting jealous because my favourite wasn't "Alvin" The Chipmunk haha.

Here's to 6 more years, 6 more decades, and probably 6 more lifetimes (HAHAH).

Thank you so much for everything in the past 6 months hehe. You've been there for me through the lowest points of my life and when I felt everybody was against me. Other people would have just walked away, or abandoned me but you never did. You stayed. You made me get up on my own feet. <3

Last but not leasttttt... The Fisheye 2, and the rainbow pancakes. I love you. :3

P/S: Of course I didn't make the cupcakes myself. I am not so talented :> If I've baked the cupcakes myself, they'd probably have been... ugh and ew and disgusting on so many levels!

I had them customized though! BUT I THOUGHT OF THE DESIGNS/CUPCAKE TOPPERS MYSELF. DO I DESERVE SOME CREDIT FOR THAT? ^^ The rainbow pancakes were made by the talented boiphrennnnnn HAHAH.

I am such a sad case. I can't cook/bake for nuts. D: Only da boiboi can cook/bake. Haha what weird dynamics. But that's just what we are. :>